What Are You Making Time For?

A few months ago I found myself asking this question.

I am a mom of two under two, so I would get to the end of my day tired and ready to relax. Like so many people, I would often find myself scrolling mindlessly through Facebook or getting lost in the never-ending stream of reels. I would go to sleep feeling like I had wasted my time.

Even when I had finished my cleaning tasks for the evening before picking up my phone, it still felt empty.

If I was truly going to be wise, I needed to remember Paul's words:

Ephesians 5:15–16

"Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil."

I purposed then to redeem my time with something useful, thought-provoking, and encouraging. I decided to start a blog called The Gentle Haven.

I jumped headfirst into planning my blog and have loved learning new things and flexing my writing skills again.

Creative writing has always been something I have loved, but I have rarely made time to write since college.

My husband could tell you that I like to write things down so I can remember them, and he could also tell you that I am a chronic over-explainer, so a blog was the obvious choice 😊.

My blog is one month old now, and I want to share some of the things I have learned and loved about this process. I hope this encourages you to evaluate how you can redeem your time well.

As I reflected on this first month of blogging, I realized there are three questions I keep coming back to. They have challenged the way I think, the way I use my time, and even my motives.

Am I Feeding My Mind, or Simply Entertaining It?

"I want to watch something happy and nothing I need to think too much about."

"I just want to sit here and do nothing."

"Just 20 more minutes, and I'll be done scrolling."

These are sentiments I have felt often and have said on multiple occasions.

After the (often long) process of putting our children to bed and getting the house cleaned and back in workable order, all I want to do is nothing—or less than that, if that's even possible.

Often, I would go to sleep not feeling as though I had relaxed, but as though I had wasted the precious time I had been given at the end of the night with nothing to show for it.

Now, don't get me wrong—I am not condemning watching a movie, using social media, or enjoying some other form of entertainment. I am especially not condemning reading blogs 😆. God gave us those things to enjoy in moderation and within healthy boundaries.

What I am advocating for is that we keep our minds engaged and intentional in whatever activity we choose so that we can guard against wrong thinking.

The Bible speaks at length about our minds and thoughts:

Philippians 4:8

"Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things."

2 Corinthians 10:5

"We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ."

Those verses challenged me because I realized that when I completely disengaged my mind at night, I was not being very intentional about what I was dwelling on.

The issue was not that scrolling or watching something was automatically sinful; it was that I often slipped into consuming content without thought, discernment, or purpose.

God has used this blog and the process of writing it as an engaged way of slowing down in the evening. I look forward to sitting down at the end of my day and putting the thoughts on paper that have been swirling around in my head all day.

Writing allows me to use a talent God has given me. It also gives me an opportunity to hopefully encourage others while making intentional use of the time I have.

I don't write every evening, and yes, I still watch movies and spend time on social media. But because I am more aware of my default mode, I try to be intentional with those activities as well.

Am I Using Social Media, or Is Social Media Using Me?

I think we can all think of an example of someone seeking unhealthy attention—whether it's a child, an influencer, or a coworker. They do things simply to receive praise or attention from others.

We know that the Bible calls us to the opposite: humility.

Jeremiah 9:23–24

"Thus says the Lord: 'Let not the wise man boast in his wisdom, let not the mighty man boast in his might, let not the rich man boast in his riches, but let him who boasts boast in this, that he understands and knows me, that I am the Lord who practices steadfast love, justice, and righteousness in the earth. For in these things I delight,' declares the Lord."

As this passage points out, our boast should be in Christ alone.

Yet, when I began my blog, I knew that if I was going to pour so much time and effort into it, I naturally wanted an audience.

By the grace of God, I have readers!

But in order to reach those readers, I must promote my blog through social media and an email list.

It is so easy for me to constantly check how many people have viewed my page or how many likes and comments I have on Facebook.

It is incredibly easy to lose focus.

My goal was to encourage and help my readers, not to go viral on social media (although that wouldn't hurt my readership 😉).

I'm not going to lie—it feels good when people engage with what I do. But I have to be constantly on guard to make sure I keep my focus and remain humble.

When clicks, views, and likes begin to consume my thoughts, that is when social media is using me instead of me using it as the tool it was meant to be.

Is My Primary Goal to Draw Attention to Myself or My Creator?

I hit Publish and immediately start worrying that no one will read it.

I post about something on Facebook, and no one has commented or liked it.

Did anyone see it or care?

Motivation and heart posture can turn something good into something sinful.

If I want to honor God with my life and everything I do, I need to look at the "why" behind it.

Colossians 3:23–24

"Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ."

Proverbs 16:2

"All the ways of a man are pure in his own eyes, but the Lord weighs the spirit."

Together, these verses remind me that God cares not only about my outward actions, but the posture of my heart. I am to work wholeheartedly for Him, not for the approval of people, because He knows the motives of my heart.

There is nothing wrong with wanting more people to see my work. It becomes wrong when I want the praise more than I want God to receive the glory.

This principle holds true for every area of life. I need to consistently check my heart to see if I am trying to worship myself or my Creator.

Moving Forward with Intention

As I celebrate the first month of The Gentle Haven, I'm grateful that 227 people have visited my small corner of the internet. It's been a joy to write, learn, and connect with my readers along the way.

But more than anything, I am grateful for how God has used this process to disrupt my autopilot mode at the end of the day.

So I'll leave you with the same questions I continue to ask myself:

• What are you making time for?

• Are you feeding your mind, or simply entertaining it?

• Are you using social media, or is social media using you?

• Is your primary goal in life to draw attention to yourself or to your Creator?

These questions have challenged the way I think, the way I use my time, and especially my motives.

My prayer is that they encourage you to redeem your time well, too.

Email

laura@thegentlehaven-blog.com

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